


I'll Meet You When I'm Ready

by rangersandlegends



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canon Compliant, F/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-16
Updated: 2018-05-16
Packaged: 2019-05-07 15:51:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14674380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rangersandlegends/pseuds/rangersandlegends
Summary: You only get your soulmate mark when you're ready. For Barry Allen, that's years before Iris West.





	I'll Meet You When I'm Ready

**Author's Note:**

> I love West-Allen, and I love soulmate markings. So here we are.

You figure out who your soulmate is when you’re ready, not a moment before. Barry had been told this as long as he could remember. His parents told him the story of how they met, how they were marked for each other from that moment on. They had looked into the others’ eyes, and knew. The marks on the inside of their wrists was only confirmation.

 

That’s how Barry felt when he met Iris. He looked into her eyes and it was like he had been struck by lightning. His nerve endings felt like live wires. He quickly checked his wrist, but Iris’ name wasn’t there. She wasn’t his soul mate. Still, he asks if they can be best friends, and she agrees. 

 

Having Iris as a best friend is the best. She’s always in his corner, and he spends all his free time with her. They make up games and invent worlds of their own to play in. He can’t imagine life getting better than this.

 

And it doesn’t. His mother dies, and his father is to blame. Barry yells at anyone he will listen that it’s not true, that his parents are soulmates. His dad couldn’t have.

 

Iris believes him. She takes his hand and leads him to his new room and sits there while he cries. He doesn’t need to be brave with her. She’s brave enough for the both of them. He’s never more grateful to have her as a best friend than those first few weeks. She’s the only reason his life has any light in it at all. She’s everything.

 

Soon it becomes clear that Barry is at the West house permanently. Barry’s dad is convicted, and the system decides he’s better off staying with Joe. If he has to be anywhere, he doesn’t mind being down the hall from Iris. She helps him put the pieces back together.

 

When they have to separate to go to college, Barry doesn’t want to go. He knows, of course, that Coast City has the best forensic sciences program in the country, and Iris is the one who drove him to apply. She’s overjoyed that he’s going. He just wishes she was coming. It’s been so long since has has had to navigate life without her. Who else will keep him fashionable, and remind him to be on time, and help him figure out girls? What if he meets his soulmate and screws it up because Iris isn’t there?

 

He almost tells her he loves her when he leaves. Instead, he makes do with a soul-crushing hug and a promise to call every day. A promise he keeps. He’s there for Iris through every science elective, every big of girl drama, every broken heart. He even takes her advice and dates a bit, trying to find his soulmate. It doesn’t work, though. He thinks back to what his mom said: you figure out who your soulmate is when you’re ready. If he’s hung up on Iris, he certainly isn’t ready.

 

Moving back to Central with his degree is worth all the hard work of the last four years. Iris is waiting for him in his old room, arms open wide for a hug. Now he’s home.

 

Everything is fine until the night of the explosion. One minute he’s in his lab, the next he’s waking up to Lady Gaga in a strange place. He only has one thought on his mind: Iris.

 

He stumbles around, meets his life-long hero, asks all the appropriate questions, but his heart is beating out of his chest. Each thump is her name, creating a drumbeat of Iris, Iris, Iris.

 

When he finds her, everything inside him settles. She’s there, in his arms, and this is real. Whatever is happening with him, it’s irrelevant. The outside world fades away, seem to stop completely. Maybe it actually does.

 

He steps out into the alley, and his hand is shaking uncontrollably. He grips it to stop the vibrations, and he sees a mark on his wrist.

 

Iris West.

 

He takes off running. And he’s fast. So fast.

 

There are tests to take and questions to answer and responses to monitor. But as soon as he can, he makes his way back to Iris. He sees her and his heart breaks into a thousand pieces. His soulmate is with another man. Today has become the best and worst day of his life.

 

She tells him it just kinda happened while he was in the coma. He nods. She tells him Eddie is a great guy. He smiles. She tells him it’s serious. He pulls the sleeve of his coat down to further cover his wrist. She’s happy, and that’s the number one objective, so how can he protest?

 

He’s not without his distractions. There’s saving the city by day, and saving the city by night. There’s investigating his mom’s murder. There’s getting faster. Maybe one day he’ll be fast enough to outrun his pain.

 

He tells her he loves her. It’s not the whole truth; he needs her to figure out the rest for herself. He’s seen her wrist and knows it’s not time yet. But maybe telling her would speed things up. Why is life moving so slowly now?

 

She doesn’t love him. Not like that. In trying to narrow the gap between them, he’s opened a gaping crevice. She moves out, and he moves in. There’s a new equilibrium, a delicate balance between best friend and scorned lover.

 

Then there’s Linda. And even though her name is not adorned on his wrist, she’s fun. It’s mindless, really, being with her. And a part of him is happy that Iris doesn’t want them together.

 

And when the world is about to end, he kisses her. He’s never felt this feeling before, kissing his soulmate. But he’s pretty sure only Iris can make him feel this way. She kisses him back and there’s no longer a tsunami threatening the city. There’s just this.

 

All too soon it’s over, and then it never happened. How could the whole world cataclysmically change and it only be real to him? How can a part of Iris not know what happened on the waterfront? It’s seared into his soul, and she and Eddie remain oblivious?

 

Iris discovers another one of his secrets. He underestimated her instincts, something he’d never do again. No wonder she becomes a front-page reporter. Iris West-Allen. His soulmate is his wife, and Eddie’s fiancee. He wishes the universe would fix it, deliver her to him.

 

The universe cruelly answers. Eddie is dead, and Iris’ wrist remains blank. He holds her as she cries every night and swears that if Eddie’s name won’t grace her wrist, no man’s will. He only holds her tighter.

 

He meets Patty. Patty is great. Her eyes sparkle when she laughs, and she solves murders like a boss. She asks him if he’s a superhero. He tells himself not telling her keeps her safe, but the only person he’s saving is himself. She leaves, and Barry tells himself it’s for the best. 

 

Iris tells him she wants to be with him, that maybe she always has. A glance at her wrist tells him she’s not ready. He goes off to die and she’s there to bring him back. Her wrist is still blank. She tells him she wants to try this, and her wrist is still blank. His father dies, they have a funeral, and she tells him she’ll always be there. He kisses her and she gasps. Her wrist is not blank.

 

He runs away. He finds himself in a place where both his parents are alive and Iris gets her mark the moment she looks in his eyes. Why couldn’t it have been this easy the first time around?

 

He returns to real life because no one can live in a fantasy forever. Iris doesn’t have his name on her skin. They date, and kiss, and discuss the future. Still nothing.

 

One night, she tells him she loves him, mark or no mark. Her mark appears, and he shows her his. He has never loved her more. She stuck by him even though the universe said nothing. She decided to make her own path, and chose him. She chose him.

 

\------------------------------------

 

Soulmates were a lie. Soulmates didn’t keep people together, didn’t stop people from leaving. Her mom, Barry’s dad. Nothing was permanent like it was supposed to be. Not even soulmates.

 

The only thing that came close was having a best friend, especially if it was Barry Allen. From the moment they meet, they are inseparable. Before school, at recess, after school, every weekend. Barry is pure joy, and Iris wants to swim in it.

 

The bond only grows stronger when Barry moves in. It is in the worst of circumstances, but they make the best of it. Soon, things are at a new normal. Barry is an awkward nerd, but he’s her awkward nerd.

 

She sobs the day he goes to Coast City. He’s going to become the best CSI ever and solve his mom’s murder, she just wishes he could do it here. They have a call every night; she turns down dates to make sure she doesn’t miss it. He tutors her on inorganic compounds, and she explains which colors go with khaki.

 

He comes back, of course, and he becomes the best CSI in Central. Everything is perfect. They still stay up late talking, and he supports her through grad school. She doesn’t need a soulmate, she just needs Barry.

 

She gets the call at 4:23 AM. She takes off running. She doesn’t get to the hospital soon enough. He’s dying. There are tubes and wires and monitors and she doesn’t care because Barry is dying. She screams and cries and he crashes and dies over and over. 

 

They stabilize him, and she finds a new normal. Wake up, visit coma ward, go to work, return to coma ward, go home. They tell her he might be able to hear her, so she talks. About nothing, about everything. He doesn’t wake up.

 

They move him to another facility. She tells him about Eddie. She doesn't know if they’re soulmates. She’s not ready to be ready to meet her soulmate. She tells him about the dates they go on, and the gifts he gives her, and the words he says. She tells Barry she might love her boyfriend, but she has no way of knowing.

 

He wakes up on a Tuesday. She’s in his arms immediately. He’s not dead. HIs heart is beating. He didn’t leave.

 

He meets Eddie. It’s a new normal, having a serious boyfriend and a best friend. And that best friend is different. He’s around less, he’s distracted, and he has new friends. She figures anyone who went through what he did would come out different. But he’s always looking at her wrist.

 

He tells her he loves her on a Tuesday. That he’s in love with her. It explains his behavior. That doesn’t make it fair. It’s not fair. He had years to tell her, and now she’s finally with someone who might not leave, and her best friend leaves. Again.

 

She doesn’t tell Eddie. Maybe she should. But her loyalty is to Barry. He finds Linda, and she finds herself angry. He doesn’t get to move on, not when she’s still reeling from his confession. It’s not fair.

 

He’s a superhero on a Tuesday. She can’t believe she didn’t see it sooner. The flirtatious red mystery man is the man who has loved her her whole life. And in some future, they’re married. How any of this is possible, she doesn’t know, so she decides to marry Eddie.

 

Eddie dies a hero. That’s what everyone says. It’s supposed to make it better, that he doesn’t die for nothing. But that’s what it feels like. It feels like the world is gray and no one sees it but her. Barry comes the closest, though. He sees the world is a little less bright without Eddie.

 

Barry is there to get her through every anniversary, every reminder, every milestone. It’s good to have a best friend again, and it’s almost enough to make her forget he’s in love with her.

 

Eddie wasn’t her soulmate. Eddie left. Everyone leaves, so there’s no point in having a soulmate. She doesn’t want one, and the universe listens. It gives her Barry instead, and that’s enough.

 

Barry finds Patty. They’re right for each other, and Iris is glad he has someone, finally, that’s right for him. She likes Patty. She really does. But Patty’s name isn’t on Barry’s wrist. She would know if it was. Barry’s wrist is probably as empty as hers.

 

Patty leaves. Iris can’t imagine why, but she does. Everyone leaves. Everyone but Barry. And maybe that means something. Maybe she can’t move on until she moves on with Barry.

 

So she tells him. She tells him and he dies. It doesn’t seem possible that her light could fade like that, but she watches it happen. Everyone leaves but Barry. Barry can’t leave. So she chases after him, into a place she doesn’t understand. She brings him home.

 

They’re so close to each other, but not close enough. Barry tells her he changed the world, that he resurrected his parents and left them to die again. It’s all noise. She hears that Barry left but came back. Even when he left, he always came back. She kisses him.

 

They are together. He doesn’t leave. Her wrist stays blank but maybe it’s okay that Barry isn’t her soulmate. She loves him. And when she tells him, he says it back. He shows her his wrist, where her name has branded him. And now his name has branded her.

 

And Iris isn’t going to leave.


End file.
